sweet sunday

so it's sunday and i feel good. so much has happened in the past week. my husband celebrated his 28th birthday! it was a very quiet, low-key kind of day. his idea of a birthday was subway sandwiches for dinner. hehe. we enjoyed it. i got him a pair of nike air-force ones which i hid in the closet until the day of his birthday. since he still doesn't have much shoes, i thought it would be a good, practical gift. i also knew that he really wanted those particular sneakers. he was surprised and happy for the gift. yay!

in other news, i am leaving my school and it feels great. i am so ready to move on. i have slowly been taking things home. i realized that i am not taking that much apart from my posters (grammar charts, editing symbols, etc.) and some teaching/instructional books. freedom is coming closer and i cant wait to be in a "better" school with competent people.

speaking of next year, i will officially be called "mrs. apenteng"! i am so excited. although i must admit it will be weird, especially since i have been called ms. belle for 2 years! the first few times someone calls me that i am probably not going to respond..haha....but eventually, i will get used to it!

my husband is at work today, and i must admit, it is really hard having him working on weekends. i am used to having the weekends together. now, saturday and sunday is out! he is off on weds and thurs. i cant wait until school is officially over so we can have those days together. we have had an amazing week together and i must say that "taking everything one day at a time" is true to the bone.

i am off to cook some barbeque chicken (nana's favorite), mac-n-cheese (my favorite), rice and peas, and salad. woohoo for domesticity!!!

peace & nappiness

p.s. i got the most amazing dresses yesterday from the salvation army!

to ring or not to ring?

so my husband doesn't like wearing his wedding band (or any jewelry for that matter). although he always wears it, once he steps in the house, he takes it off. this really bothers me. am i being too picky? i just feel that it is such a symbol of our love, although he sees it as something 'society' has created within the institution of marriage. however, it is something that i personally love, because it is a small remembrance of our marital union, which is beautiful! sigh. so although he does wear it, i know in his heart he is bothered. what kind of compromise can we come to? for me, i have compromised by not caring when he takes if off upon walking into the house. yet still, i would be happier if he had it on 24/7.....but i guess we have to take each other's feelings into consideration.

anyhow, this morning we were having a really good morning. my husband was on his way to work and i was on my way to the track for a run. as we were walking out together, i thought i didn't see his wedding ring on. so i asked nicely: "are you gonna wear your ring today?" he looks at me and points to his finger....the ring was already on. for some reason, i didn't see it! i felt really silly afterwards, because he did have it on. but i had every right to inquire, especially considering that he has left without it on a few occasions....right?

peace & nappiness

Each Day Gets Better....

so it has been almost 72 hours since the big argument and i must say things have been a bit better. my husband has been trying to be more affectionate and is wearing his ring more....i hope it remains consistent, because i don't feel as if i am asking for too much. i have also attempted to be more aware of his feelings and his needs. although i am always very attentive when it comes to him, i am trying to learn more about him in order to understand him more. as we evolve together, we will both change. he has been working a lot of hours and yesterday when he walked in the door, i jumped on him :-) he didn't get home until 9pm! thank the heavens he has today and tomorrow off. whew. we really love each other...that is one thing i do know. we just need to work on the little things. it's the little things that make a big difference.

i started running early in the morning again. it feels good. i think that was the missing link that was making me feel imbalanced. also, my abs appreciate it when i run early in the morning....

one day at a time, because each day gets better!

peace and nappiness

a bit bumpy....

the past week has been a bit bumpy for my husband and i. petty disagreements and then one huge argument....it was intense. and it always gets even more intense because we are both stubborn....especially him! there are a lot of things that i want from him, like wearing his ring all the time, not just when we go out, or when he leaves the house, and he thinks that it's not a big deal. according to him, he is married to me and not the world. then i began to wonder, am i putting my image of what i think marriage is supposed to be first, instead of considering my partner's feelings? am i following tv stories subconsciously, or even perhaps the lives of characters in a novel? whatever it is, i know one thing is certain: marriage is not easy. it takes two completely devoted people, 24/7! that in itself sometimes seems overwhelming to me. yet on the same note, it is so amazingly beautiful. waking up every day and seeing that person. sharing with that person. having a family with that person. how beautiful is that?

prayer and really good friends who are also married is helping me. i am realizing that another thing that is hard for my husband is that he doesn't have an outlet yet. he doesn't have a close male friend here who he can share his thoughts with. i have tons of people who are so supportive and give caring, loving and objective advice. i am considering that too. in the meantime, i am going to not stress out about the ring and other little things. instead i am going to focus on all of the positive aspects of our relationship....according to the list i made, there happen to be more pros than cons.....that is a sign...and a good one at that!

peace & nappiness

blessed!

these pictures describe my mood today!

i am so blessed and thankful for everything! i am really lucky and i know this. thank you to the creator for continuing to bless me emotionally, financially and spiritually.

by the way, the quote from my blog comes from james baldwin's famous line:"to act is to be committed. to be committed is to be in danger."i love that quote. so much in two sentences. perfect.

peace & nappiness <3 <3 <3

GOOD NEWS!

my amazing husband got a job as a sales associate at paragon! it's a sporting goods store in the union square area! woohoo! i am sooo excited for him and he is sooo excited. now we can breathe and relax and enjoy 2 incomes in the household! yay! he went in yesterday and was hired on the spot. we still haven't heard from the plaza hotel. if we do hear from them with good news, i think he will work there eventually. I AM SOOOOO HAPPY!

i finally told my principal the truth: i will not be teaching at my school next year. he took it okay, but he seemed a bit sad. he told me he was going to miss me and that the door was always open! that was nice. i feel so relieved and now i can be honest with other people in the building regarding my plans for next year. WHEW! (brushing off my shoulder)

my husband starts work tomorrow! it is going to weird to come home and not see him. i guess i will get used to it. according to his schedule, he has wednesdays and thursdays off! yay! i am soooooo excited for another new beginning....not for me this time, but for my other half :-)

last but not least, i am reading two amazing books right now. the first is "Tell Me How Long the Train's Been Gone" by James Baldwin. He is one of my favorite authors, so I love just about everythng he writes....so far, it's amazing. it's about an african american actor during the civil rights movement. the second book is titled "The 158 lb Marriage" by James Irving. this one is about marriage and how intense it is to love one person for the rest of your life. it's very funny and witty, also deep and analytical. i am loving both. finally, myself and a friend of mine, who I work with, will both be reading the famous Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy! woohoo! it's almost 900 pages! it will be nice to share a book with someone.

LIFE IS REALLY GOOD RIGHT NOW...AMEN!

peace & nappiness

anonymous

i love the anonymity of this blog. nobody really knows about it, except for one other person who is close to me. other than that, nobody knows. i kind of like it this way. i had a blog before that many people read, many of my friends, whether they were close or not, and i felt myself holding back sometimes because i knew they would read it. however, knowing that i am anonymous, allows me to fully be free in my thoughts etc.

i had an amazing memorial day weekend. on saturday, my husband and i went to a traditional ghanaian christening. it was amazing to see how differently christenings are done in west africa. a lot of prayers were said in honor of the ancestors, followed by the baby tasting a small taste of gin and water. the rationale was so that the baby would know the difference between a truth and a lie. when the baby tasted the water, she had no reaction. when she tasted the gin, she smiled and seemed to want more! haha. this made everyone laugh. lastly, everyone took a sip of gin at the end in honor of the baby and her name (she had about 6 or 7 names!)

we had fun. the baby who was christened was the baby of my husband's cousin who happens to be 28. my husband is 27. i could tell he felt pressured, that he too hadn't yet crossed this path in his life. and of course everyone kept asking: "so when will you guys start?" or people said: "you guys are next!" this made us smile uncomfortably and nonchalantly, because deep down we want a child. we are just not ready! first of all, my husband is still looking for a job. we haven't heard from the plaza yet, and it has really been eating away at him for the past week. the interview went amazingly well and they seemed to love him. where is the job offer phone call?! sigh. secondly, we need to save more, more, more. the economy sucks and things are so much more expensive. we both want to be smart and not only make the decision to have a child based on love. money matters too. sigh.

as the weekend continued, my husband said things like: "i'm going to be a father soon" and "my kids will know the difference between right and wrong" etc. HE HAS BABY FEVER TOO! YAY! of course, he would never admit to this. oh yeah, at the christening, my husband held the baby, and didn't let her go. he played with her, laughed with her, it was amazing to see him like that. i never saw that side of him...ever! babies are amazing. i can't wait until our time. hopefully we can start trying at the end of the year....as long as my husband is working by then.

i went to the DanceAfrica performance on sunday! it was great. such amazing dancers. i really miss dancing. i really do. i wanted to run on the stage and start dancing....i had fun. my husband decided not to come. his rationale was as follows:
"why would i go to something called DanceAfrica, when i'm African? I already know about african culture!"
i was annoyed by his sentiments, but ignored him and went alone. right before the show began, guess who called? yes, my husband saying: "sorry i am not there, but i hope you enjoy the show..."

isn't he cute?

anyhow, my students are really good today. we read a poem by langston hughes called "madam and the rent man". it was a poem about not paying your rent due to living in a broke down apt. most of my students could relate to it, and they loved it...

in other news, I AM READY FOR JUNE 26TH!!!!!!!!!!! the last day of school!

peace & nappiness